Monthly Archives: May 2015

24/7

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Children need to know that they always have access to their parents. There should never be a time when a child feels as though the door to his mom and dad is closed. On the contrary, when my son or my daughter knocks on our door, he or she should know that the sign reads “Open, 24/7”.

Unfortunately, many children knock on the door that has another sign hanging there. “Busy”. “Come back later”. “Take a number”. “On vacation”. What we as parents need to understand is that children don’t need to have a “reason”. Their problem or question doesn’t have to be earth shattering. It doesn’t have to be a crisis. In fact, it doesn’t have to be anything. Maybe all he or she needs is a hug, a smile, or a pat on the head. Maybe the question is not the point of coming at all, but a smoke screen of what’s really happening inside: a cry for affection, or affirmation. I find even my older kids will at times just come and sit on my lap—for nothing!

Of course there are also real problems or questions that are itching for an answer too. They start out simple and grow complex as our children grow. But each step along the way, they need to know they can come to us, anywhere, anytime. Otherwise, when children find that our door is closed, they will begin to knock elsewhere. Little girls may knock on the door of the first boy who shows an interest in them, and then the next, and the next. Little boys may knock on the door of the boy in the gang who is a little older, and cooler than they are. Before you know it, your daughter has formed an approach to life, and your son has become trapped in a web from which escape is costly.

Being a parent does not mean you have to know everything. But it does mean that you have to be available. It means your children need to know that your door is always open: “24/7”.

Gatekeepers

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“The two angels arrived at Sodom in the evening, and Lot
was sitting in the gateway of the city.” Genesis 19:1

You suppose Lot may have regretted the day he chose to part from Uncle Abe and “pitch his tents near Sodom” (v.13:12)? I’ll say! Yet even after Abram had risked his own life once to recover Lot, his family, and all his possessions after being taken captive, Lot still went back to Sodom! Now, years later, Lot was in a quandary. The sin of the city was so great, 2 Peter 2:8 says every day he was “tormented in his righteous soul”, just trying to cope. And so he sat in the gate of the city in this vexed state. For what? What was he thinking?

Before I get to this, let me refresh you on the facts of the story. For in reality, many have held God to unfair judgment, as though He willy nilly rained fire and brimstone down on a group of helpless people. In fact, the story is more about God’s mercy than it is about His judgment. Sodom was completely filled with evil. Not even ten decent people could be found in the city, and that included the members of Lot’s household! When one considers the extent of the depravity and depths of wickedness, it is a wonder that God stayed His hand as long as He did just for the sake of a few.

Details you ask? OK, how is this. Lot invited the two angels to be his house guests. When they were preparing to settle down for the night, “all the man from every part of the city of Sodom—both young and old—surrounded the house”. They insisted that Lot release his guests to them “so that we can have sex with them” (Gen 19:4,5). Ouch! Every male, young and old, completely bent on vile deeds, even to the point of raping any unsuspecting journeyer who happened to enter the gates of the city and not leave before nightfall.

So, back to Lot sitting at the gate. Daily, Lot had to withstand the onslaught of evil around him. I believe Lot was doing the following:

  • Lot was devising creative ways to shelter his family from Sodom’s poison, and consider how he could nurture them in godliness.
  • From the gate, his gaze was fixed outside the walls, yearning for a place free from perversion, a kingdom which would have no end, full of justice and truth.
  • He hoped against hope that someone would pass through these gates with whom he could have godly communication.
  • His conscience pricked him to warn and even rescue (provide a safe haven) travelers from the corruption and dangers lurking within.

Cities and nations don’t become Sodom and Gomorrah overnight. Paul describes one such slippery moral slope in Romans 1:18-23 which begins with men who “suppress the truth.” He says, “for although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God not gave them to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened.” The slope continues down to the cesspool at the bottom, where God “abandons them to do whatever shameful things their hearts desire…they did vile and degrading things with each other’s bodies.”

The Sodoms of Biblical lore are no longer Sunday school material. Our own cities and streets are being “sodomized”. Whereas the day will come when we will be told to flee, until that day, God is looking for Gatekeepers in the same spirit as Lot. If you are being tormented in your righteous soul, there is a place for you at the gate. It’ s a place to ponder, and a place to plan. It’s a place to find hope for the future, as well as for today. It is a place of rescue, for there are yet those who are seeking refuge, who refuse to give in to the spirit of this age.  It is not a place to complain or fall into despair.  For Lot, the gate was a place of action, a place of service.

Now you know why Lot was sitting in the gateway of the city. I can imagine him singing this song as he waited:

“Lift up your heads, O you gates;
be lifted up, you ancient doors,
that the King of glory may come in.
Who is this King of glory?
The LORD strong and mighty,
the LORD mighty in battle.”
PS 24:7-8

Mining For Gold

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The definition of a prospector is an explorer whose sole purpose is to discover riches under the surface, usually gold. From 1849 to 1855, 300,000 people traveled to California from across America and a dozen foreign lands in search of wealth in what later was called “The Gold Rush”. Some struck it rich, but many only faced hardships, leaving debts, debauchery, and broken families in their wake.

A wise parent is like a seasoned prospector. But unlike the temporal and selfish pursuits of these gold diggers, his passion is to explore the riches that lie just beneath the surface of his children, waiting to be discovered. Unlike the tens of thousands who suffered greatly and lived with regrets during the great Rush, a parent will never be disappointed if he spends time mining for treasure in his sons and daughters. His investment of time, and sacrifices for a cause, will make discovering bullion seem trivial, even foolish. Even among the prospectors who made millions, many died miserable, disillusioned, or having squandered the wealth for which they had blindly left all else behind. But a father or mother who recognizes the immense potential in a child–who patiently, skillfully, prayerfully, extracts from them gifts, creativity, passions, and talent–is one who has chosen the right priority. They will live to see so much “wealth” created, they will wonder how anyone could have chosen a shiny piece of rock over the wonder and enchantment of a child who grows up secure and contented because he knew that in Mom and Dad’s eyes, he was so much more precious than gold.